Like A Prayer

Life Is A Mystery

It Isn't The Process Of Prayer That’s The Problem, It’s The Way It’s Framed


Like A Prayer. It Isn't The Process Of Prayer That’s The Problem, It’s The Way It’s Framed. Distorted picture of woman in tears praying.

Like A Prayer - The Song

The Madonna song "Like A Prayer" was released exactly 30 years ago this week, at time of writing, and it achieved 3 interconnected objectives:

  1. It caused major controversy [especially within the Roman Catholic church]
  2. It became a major commercial success
  3. It boosted her career after the critical and commercial failure of her last 2 film projects

Madonna described "Like A Prayer" as about a passionate young girl "so in love with God that it is almost as though He were the male figure in her life."



    Life is a mystery
    Everyone must stand alone
    I hear you call my name
    And it feels like home
    When you call my name it's like a little prayer

    Madonna







Why Don't We Like A Prayer?

Regardless of what we feel about Madonna or her song the topic of prayer often arouses strong reactions.

Usually, it is something that we associate with organised religion and for most of us this is not on our current radar.

It is also seen by many of us as a sign of weakness or desperation to resort to prayer. We live in a culture of self sufficiency. We are very much a "do-it-yourself" people.

Unless you have been through a recovery programme of one kind or another, turning to prayer as a last resort is seen and felt as a desperate sign of pathetic weakness.


Why I didn't like a prayer

For me prayer has associations with my childhood and the strict and obsessive religious environment in which I was raised.

I have many memories of the unnatural sounding language and the formulaic repetitions.

The overall sense it conveyed to me was of good big God up there and bad little me, and all the other despicable miserable sinners, down here.

The way these prayers were structured it always gave me the impression that unless you spoke in the right "code" - which had to include lots of biblical references - then God couldn't or wouldn't hear let alone respond.

These days I can find a beauty and a meaning in the structured litany and liturgy of the Anglican Church in the Christian tradition, and the vows, invocations and expressions of gratitude and compassion of Buddhism.

But in my early adult life I rejected it all and determined to find my own way.



    Over a period of few years I came to realise that it wasn't the process of prayer that was the problem it was the way it was framed, and the context within which it was framed.









When Is A Prayer Not Like A Prayer?

The modern origins of the word prayer come from the medieval French word "preiere" or "prière" which means to make an intense request, or an appeal to a higher authority about a specific matter.

The french words were based on the Latin "precaria", "precarius" or "precari" all of which have modern meanings "to petition", to be "given as a favour" or "to ask, beg or make an intense request".

In all interpretations, from an etymological perspective, it means that:



    The position of the person who is praying is that of a subordinate or supplicant asking a higher authority or power - traditionally God - for something.








Framing

For the modern person who is not a practitioner or devotee of a faith tradition this framing of prayer does not resonate and likely provokes the adverse reactions I referred to above.

Framing is all about the words we use to describes things and the feeling those words evoke within us.

So if you change your language you change how you feel about the thing that your words describe.


Reframing "PRAYER" as "COMMUNION"

I propose that we reframe the word Prayer with the word Communion as the noun, and the word Communing as the verb.

The word Communion comes from the medieval French word "comunion" meaning "participation in something"; "that which is common to all"; and "fellowship, mutual participation, a sharing".

This in turn is derived from the Latin "com" meaning "with or together" and "unus" meaning "oneness or union".

So when is a prayer not like a prayer?

When it's a communion.



    We move from prayer as a subordinate or supplicant asking a higher authority, a higher power, or God for something, to a communion.

    COMMUNION = TOGETHER IN ONENESS









What Is The Context Of Communion?

I have found it helpful to approach this outside of the context of any specific faith tradition. But if you are in a faith tradition that's fine and we are not in argument.

Before I move to directly address the context of communion I would like to direct you to an earlier article on "Living With Your Thoughts" where I proposed a simple model for understanding and developing a good working relationship with your mind and then a section on understanding your selves.

In this article and elsewhere I describe the higher self as your hardwired portal to the universe and everything "out there" - of Consciousness – or The Energy Of Life or the dimension of spirituality.

This context is important because communion with the different levels of your mind and between your many selves unites them together in a oneness that is Consciousness.

Buddhist teacher Zuisei Goddard expresses this rather well:

"Often, prayer is associated with a god or gods, as an act of worship, reverence, supplication.

I think of it more broadly and more simply as being in relationship with ourselves, first and foremost, but also with the sacred, with reality, with awakening, with the divine within.

So, praying, to me, is to be in relationship with a deeper, larger, more connected, more integral part of our being."

This reframed understanding of prayer is expansive and holistic.

Ok, now to address the question:

I see communion as a communing with the various elements or levels of your Consciousness.

Many of the practices shared on this site involve that process:

It also includes communing with the natural world in all of its multitude of various and wonderful manifestations.

One of the most powerful ways of communing with Consciousness is just to be present.



    Communion is communing with Consciousness - in ALL its manifestations.





How to Commune?

As with any close human relationship sometimes a companionable silence is sufficient.

Other times when you feel the need to say something, share something or ask something - just do it and simply direct your communication to that part of Consciousness you want to address.

This maybe "within yourself" as outlined in some of practices above, or you may want to commune with Consciousness "out there" but either way there is no set formula, there are no magic words, just do it!

You don't have to use the "god word" if it bothers you, just talk to "my higher self" - or you don't need a word at all to name Consciousness just do it.

As with all good human communication between friends, the best communication is spontaneous, authentic and spoken from the heart.

I appreciate that to some readers this may all sound rather odd - but all I can say is that the intentional communication with as much of Consciousness as you are aware of is a deeply enriching and transformative approach to living, and eventually you will find that:



    The life well lived is like a prayer.









Next Article: Fear Of Missing Out - "I'll Have What She's Having!"

Return from "Like A Prayer" to: Walking The Talk


Contact me






English Chinese (Traditional) Russian French German Italian Spanish Vietnamese




If you have found this site helpful and would like to support our work


LATEST ARTICLES

  1. And So This Is Christmas

    There Is No Path To Peace - The Path Is Peace Thich Nhat Hanh, the renowned Vietnamese Zen Buddhist monk, teacher, and peace activist, often spoke about peace as a state of being that begins within on…

    Read More

  2. Curiosity Skilled The Cat - Optimize For Interesting

    Curiosity Fuels Excellence The old adage, “Curiosity killed the cat,” warns of the dangers of venturing too far into the unknown. But what if we reimagine it not as a risk but as a gateway to developi…

    Read More

  3. Let Stillness Speak - Living Within A Complex System

    To let stlllness speak is to learn it's first major lesson: you are not your thoughts. To let stillness speak is about stepping back from the constant chatter of your mind and allowing a deeper, quiet…

    Read More

  4. Understanding Complex Systems Thinking - It's Not Complicated

    Understanding, and being able to work with, complexity is an important thinking skill. We are all working with complex systems, and we do so every day. The biggest one is life itself. We automaticall…

    Read More

  5. Stay On The Bus - When To Keep On Going

    The Helsinki Bus Station Theory Have you ever started a new project, initiative or role with a big vision and a determination to make a difference? Initially you were full of enthusiasm and highly mo…

    Read More

  6. Zen Thoughts Email Series

    Conversations With A Friend Zen Thoughts is an email series of 50 short messages spread over 3 months. The messages are written in the style of a conversation with a friend who is going through a toug…

    Read More

  7. How to Get What You Value by Changing What You Measure

    Give Up Control & Gain Influence To Get What You Want The metrics we choose to focus on can significantly shape our outcomes, sometimes in ways we don't intend. The challenge is to make sure that you…

    Read More

  8. How to Become A Master At Overcoming Hard Moments

    "The best in the world are not the best because they win every point. It's because they lose again and again and have learned how to deal with it." This quote from Roger Federer has got a lot of cover…

    Read More

  9. Drop The Story - Deal With Your Demons and Transform Your Experience

    Are you living your life from the stories you tell yourself? Learning how to drop the story and deal with that voice in your head can be a game changer. When you can do this you will have a powerful t…

    Read More

  10. Standing In The Gap Between No Longer And Not Yet

    Standing In The Gap In Conditions Of Imposed Change. This is about imposed change and surviving a dire and desperate situation where you are stuck in a difficult or seemingly impossible set of circums…

    Read More

  11. Preparing The Ground - For Things You Can Not See

    We plough the fields and scatter the good seed on the ground. The phrase "preparing the ground" is a metaphor for making the necessary preparations to create the favourable conditions for something to…

    Read More

  12. Easing The Weight Of Expectation

    Don’t you often feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your back? Our start point is understanding that the ego has a very clear idea of how things ought to be, and its intention and ex…

    Read More

  13. Coram Deo - Living In Consciousness

    In you there is a dimension of consciousness far deeper than thought. It is the very essence of who you are. Coram Deo is about living in consciousness. It is a Latin phrase which literally means “to…

    Read More

  14. The Power Of Patience - Why You Need The World's Toughest Quality

    Nothing in the world can take the place of patience. Patience and persistence are omnipotent. In everyday life, patience is often overshadowed by the desire for immediate results. We live in an era of…

    Read More

  15. Demonizing The Other and Personal Acts Of Compassion

    What Does Demonizing The Other Mean? Demonizing the other refers to the act of portraying a group of people or an individual as inherently evil, threatening, or inferior. It often serves to justify di…

    Read More




3 Keys Solutions



The Balanced Toolkit