On Becoming The Ferryman
The Art Of Living Is Knowing How To Make Use Of Suffering
As The Ferryman you transmute the base metal of your own pain and suffering to bring hope and healing to others
The Life Of The Ferryman
The traditional life of The Ferryman is all about transporting passengers from one side of a river or estuary to the other. He is needed where the water is too deep for a crossing on foot and where there is no bridge. In literature and mythology he is often seen as an agent of transition from life to death.
In this article we see the ferryman as an agent of transition, and a champion of compassion, in the context of suffering and pain.
We all want health, wealth and personal happiness. Yet it is in these three big areas that we all get tested, eventually. We all suffer at some point - one way or another.
Suffering is an unavoidable part of the human condition. Often we just struggle on through it as best we can until things take a turn for the better. But there are other times when there is nothing more we can do and still it goes on, and on.
Traditional teaching suggests that you have two options: you can resist suffering or you can accept it.
I want to offer you a third, and potentially more powerful option, you can use suffering.
You can let go of
self-centered worries and become a champion of compassion. It can be the
greatest happiness of all. But it comes at a cost.
Compassion is threatening to the ego. We might think of it as
something warm and soothing, but actually it’s very raw. When we set out
to support other beings, when we go so far as to stand in their shoes,
when we aspire to never close down to anyone, we quickly find ourselves
in the uncomfortable territory of “life not on my terms.”
Who Is The Ferryman?
In Buddhist thought and teaching The Ferryman is a metaphor for a champion of compassion.
- The Ferryman knows that we all cross the river of life together, that we are all in the same boat, we are all fundamentally the same and want the same things.
- The attitude of the Ferryman is that the pain that usually drags you down and causes you to withdraw into yourself is the stepping-stone for awakening your compassion and your understanding of the pain of others.
- The Ferryman seeks the best in all people and does his or her best to help everyone open to their true nature together.
Personal notes
In a recent article I shared how my late father suffered thoughout his life from many serious and tragic setbacks, and how he experienced depression, despair and a deep seated feeling of not being good enough.
Yet despite his pain and unresolved suffering he reached out to many people and through his personal kindnesses, and especially through his lifelong ministry as a Methodist lay preacher, he touched the lives of many people.
In preparation for his funeral I received the following tribute from someone to whom he had been a surrogate Uncle right to the end of his life:
“Don was one of the good guys and he made an intense and positive impact on our lives."
On a personal note, I carry wounds, deep wounds that I have borne for over 20 years - the best years of my adult life - and that I am not yet ready to share in a public forum such as this.
It is from these depths that I find the means and motivation to share, through all of the articles on this website, some of the little I have learned. I do this in the hope that it may bring help and support to many others in their passage across the river of life.
Further Reading:
- Making The Warrior Commitment
- The Grit In The Oyster, The Pearl In The Shell
- What Is My Life Purpose - Key Pointers To The Meaning Of Your Life
- More In Common And The Narcissism of Minor Differences
- Generativity - What Impact Will You Leave In The Lives Of Others?
Next Article: Things Of The Spirit
Return from "On Becoming The Ferryman" to: Walking The Talk
Or to: What Is Spirituality?
LATEST ARTICLES
Outcome Over Optics - Long Game Outcomes Over Short-Term Ego Gains
The Day I Learned To Focus On Outcome Over Optics I have never forgotten the day I learned to focus on outcomes over optics and figured out a very simple way of saving myself several hundred thousand…The ETTO Principle - Why Near Enough Can Be Good Enough
How To Balance the Efficiency-Thoroughness Trade Off The ETTO Principle describes the inherent trade-off between working efficiently and working thoroughly. This trade-off is something that affects…Master The Art Of Drawing The Bow
Focus On Process Not Outcome In so many areas of our lives, we focus on the outcome, not the process that we follow to achieve it. In the western world, we are conditioned to pay less attention to how…And So This Is Christmas
There Is No Path To Peace - The Path Is Peace Thich Nhat Hanh, the renowned Vietnamese Zen Buddhist monk, teacher, and peace activist, often spoke about peace as a state of being that begins within on…Curiosity Skilled The Cat - Optimize For Interesting
Curiosity Fuels Excellence The old adage, “Curiosity killed the cat,” warns of the dangers of venturing too far into the unknown. But what if we reimagine it not as a risk but as a gateway to developi…Let Stillness Speak - Living Within A Complex System
To let stlllness speak is to learn it's first major lesson: you are not your thoughts. To let stillness speak is about stepping back from the constant chatter of your mind and allowing a deeper, quiet…Understanding Complex Systems Thinking - It's Not Complicated
Understanding, and being able to work with, complexity is an important thinking skill.
We are all working with complex systems, and we do so every day. The biggest one is life itself. We automaticall…Stay On The Bus - When To Keep On Going
The Helsinki Bus Station Theory
Have you ever started a new project, initiative or role with a big vision and a determination to make a difference? Initially you were full of enthusiasm and highly mo…Zen Thoughts Email Series
Conversations With A Friend Zen Thoughts is an email series of 50 short messages spread over 3 months. The messages are written in the style of a conversation with a friend who is going through a toug…How to Get What You Value by Changing What You Measure
Give Up Control & Gain Influence To Get What You Want
The metrics we choose to focus on can significantly shape our outcomes, sometimes in ways we don't intend. The challenge is to make sure that you…How to Become A Master At Overcoming Hard Moments
"The best in the world are not the best because they win every point. It's because they lose again and again and have learned how to deal with it." This quote from Roger Federer has got a lot of cover…Drop The Story - Deal With Your Demons and Transform Your Experience
Are you living your life from the stories you tell yourself? Learning how to drop the story and deal with that voice in your head can be a game changer. When you can do this you will have a powerful t…Standing In The Gap Between No Longer And Not Yet
Standing In The Gap In Conditions Of Imposed Change. This is about imposed change and surviving a dire and desperate situation where you are stuck in a difficult or seemingly impossible set of circums…Preparing The Ground - For Things You Can Not See
We plough the fields and scatter the good seed on the ground. The phrase "preparing the ground" is a metaphor for making the necessary preparations to create the favourable conditions for something to…Easing The Weight Of Expectation
Don’t you often feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your back? Our start point is understanding that the ego has a very clear idea of how things ought to be, and its intention and ex…