You suffer every time you believe a thought that argues with what is.
When your mind is perfectly clear, what is, is what you want.
If you want reality to be different than it is, you might as well try to teach a cat to bark.
You can try and try, and in the end the cat will look up at you and say, “Meow.”
Wanting reality to be different than it is - is hopeless.
And yet, if you pay attention, you’ll notice that you think thoughts like this dozens of times a day:
These thoughts are ways of wanting reality to be different than it is.
If you think that this sounds depressing, you’re right.
Much of the stress that you feel is caused by arguing with what is.
Reality is what is true. The truth is whatever is in front of you right now.
For example, whether you like it or not, it’s snowing now. “It shouldn’t be snowing” is just a thought.
In reality, there is no such thing as a “should” or a “shouldn’t”.
These are only judgements - thoughts - that we project onto reality.
Remove the judgements and you can see reality as it is, and this leaves you free to act with clarity and effectiveness.
In a previous article in this series I wrote about The Transformative Power Of Acceptance which is a mindfulness practice that I use and that is based around deep acceptance of how things are right NOW in this present moment.
This practice involves consciously exercising deep and intense acceptance of the feelings that are present in the moment – especially all resistance, negativity and fear about accepting what is present.
Through increased mindfulness practice, you will discover that you are almost continuously in varying degrees of resistance to something. I know and accept that I am.
This process is known as “The Work” and was created by Byron Katie, and it is free.
Here are the full instructions.
This is a simple practice.
I use it, and in my experience it is powerful, and I commend it to you.
Further Reading On Acceptance:
The Transforming Power Of Acceptance
Next Article:
Return from: "Teach A Cat To Bark "
LATEST ARTICLES
Outcome Over Optics - Long Game Outcomes Over Short-Term Ego Gains
The Day I Learned To Focus On Outcome Over Optics I have never forgotten the day I learned to focus on outcomes over optics and figured out a very simple way of saving myself several hundred thousand…
The ETTO Principle - Why Near Enough Can Be Good Enough
How To Balance the Efficiency-Thoroughness Trade Off The ETTO Principle describes the inherent trade-off between working efficiently and working thoroughly. This trade-off is something that affects…
Master The Art Of Drawing The Bow
Focus On Process Not Outcome In so many areas of our lives, we focus on the outcome, not the process that we follow to achieve it. In the western world, we are conditioned to pay less attention to how…
And So This Is Christmas
There Is No Path To Peace - The Path Is Peace Thich Nhat Hanh, the renowned Vietnamese Zen Buddhist monk, teacher, and peace activist, often spoke about peace as a state of being that begins within on…
Curiosity Skilled The Cat - Optimize For Interesting
Curiosity Fuels Excellence The old adage, “Curiosity killed the cat,” warns of the dangers of venturing too far into the unknown. But what if we reimagine it not as a risk but as a gateway to developi…
Let Stillness Speak - Living Within A Complex System
To let stlllness speak is to learn it's first major lesson: you are not your thoughts. To let stillness speak is about stepping back from the constant chatter of your mind and allowing a deeper, quiet…
Understanding Complex Systems Thinking - It's Not Complicated
Understanding, and being able to work with, complexity is an important thinking skill.
We are all working with complex systems, and we do so every day. The biggest one is life itself. We automaticall…
Stay On The Bus - When To Keep On Going
The Helsinki Bus Station Theory
Have you ever started a new project, initiative or role with a big vision and a determination to make a difference? Initially you were full of enthusiasm and highly mo…
Zen Thoughts Email Series
Conversations With A Friend Zen Thoughts is an email series of 50 short messages spread over 3 months. The messages are written in the style of a conversation with a friend who is going through a toug…
How to Get What You Value by Changing What You Measure
Give Up Control & Gain Influence To Get What You Want
The metrics we choose to focus on can significantly shape our outcomes, sometimes in ways we don't intend. The challenge is to make sure that you…
How to Become A Master At Overcoming Hard Moments
"The best in the world are not the best because they win every point. It's because they lose again and again and have learned how to deal with it." This quote from Roger Federer has got a lot of cover…
Drop The Story - Deal With Your Demons and Transform Your Experience
Are you living your life from the stories you tell yourself? Learning how to drop the story and deal with that voice in your head can be a game changer. When you can do this you will have a powerful t…
Standing In The Gap Between No Longer And Not Yet
Standing In The Gap In Conditions Of Imposed Change. This is about imposed change and surviving a dire and desperate situation where you are stuck in a difficult or seemingly impossible set of circums…
Preparing The Ground - For Things You Can Not See
We plough the fields and scatter the good seed on the ground. The phrase "preparing the ground" is a metaphor for making the necessary preparations to create the favourable conditions for something to…
Easing The Weight Of Expectation
Don’t you often feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your back? Our start point is understanding that the ego has a very clear idea of how things ought to be, and its intention and ex…